Reaching out to the public: a military spouse duty?

First off, let me tell you a story about what I have learned about public outreach through working on my PhD. Then, I'll explain what I think this has to do with military families
The NSF GK-12 fellowship has been awesome. Last year I presented my work with a local high school at the American Association for the Advancement of Science Meeting in San Diego, CA. It was really fun and I generated some good press for myself with the National Science Foundation which is really good. My nerd love moment came when they hosted Talk of the Nation Science Friday live from the conference and while I didn't to shake Ira Flatow's (the host) hand, I did get to see him in the flesh. He looked pretty much like I had imagined over the many years of listening to him in the car. I so wish I could be his radio sidekick for a living. I think that would be so fun.
I also had another great experience last year. Our principle investigator invited Randy Olson to screen "Sizzle: A Global Warming Comedy" along with a discussion of his new book, "Don't Be Such a Scientist: Talking Sense in an Age of Style" at BIG U. The movie is AWESOME. You so don't have to have any background knowledge to understand it and it is really funny. It's a mockumentary that actually teaches you about the issue. I HIGHLY recommend it...HIGHLY, really. I showed it to my class last year and the kids loved it soo much that one of them actually shaved his head like the cameraman in the movie to reduce pollution from using shampoo. I am not sure his mom was thrilled, but I was. So Dr. Olson's gave up a tenured position (very highly coveted) at a major research institution to move to Hollywood and become a filmmaker and make science themed films that don't put the public to sleep, but which educate them about the issue without them even knowing it. It's ingenius! His argument is that we can be true to who we are while having a good time, or scientist doesn't have to equal stuffy. There are days when I think being his sidekick would be an awesome job too. Could I get paid for that? Oh, you should also check out Flock of Dodos. I laughed my ass off, but it was also a good reality check for me as a scientist about what pompous asses we come of as sometimes.
So what's my point? It's manifold actually: 1) You can communicate a complex message in a simple way that neither talks down to the recipient, nor oversimplifies the issue and 2) You can have fun while doing it. I think this message is really needed in the scientific realm, because it means we have to talk our fear of not being serious out of the equation. Science actually is fun. That's why I am a scientist. I wouldn't do it if it were dull. I mean, yes, I have days where I do dull, repetitive tasks, but I have also had days where I have traversed glaciers and climbed mountains and discovered new things under a microscope. The thing I struggle with is actually dealing with the holier than thou science types, because I tend not to be a person who respects title, rather I respect people based on how they interact with me.
But these types of issues aren't restricted to science. I think the military has some MAJOR image problems that need to be addressed and there are some people out there doing a great job on that, and there is an interesting comment in the letters that responded to this piece. I was reading a friend's blog this morning and she was communicating that she was approached by a producer about a show on military life. I totally support her decision and this is not a criticism of her in any way, especially since I didn't hear the actual conversation that occurred and don't know all the details. Instead I would like to make some general comments about the military's and military families' image issues.
As wonderful as the NPR piece on military families was, as nice as the NBC piece on Lori Bell's work was last week, they really impact very limited audiences. NPR listeners tend to be well-educated and these tend to be a group of people who really expect certain types of viewpoints and analysis on issues. They are the same people who watch the science channel, and NOVA specials. It's a preaching to the converted in a way. And, the women who are put in a position to speak about military family issues are almost always high ranking officers wives, which preserves a type of female parallel hierarchy in the military community. I remember when Blue Star Families started up and I was so excited about them, because they were authentic and didn't have spouses of rank running the show. Then, the decided to add all sorts of Generals and Admirals wives to the Board of Directors simply because these women are Admirals and Generals wives. I am sure they are great people and I mean them no disrespect, but they have a very specific viewpoint that is not always a good representation of the community of spouses as a whole. This bothers me, because it forces so many spouses who don't fit the mold into the blogosphere where we have a modicum of interaction, but it is inherently diluted by time, distance and most importantly by the fact that you don't see many of the viewpoints represented in FRG meetings and other places that are supposed to be designed for military families to gain support. So the organization stays the same, by using women to reaffirm institutional norms in the media.
On the other end of this, you have shows like Army Wives, which I don't understand why people watch. This show preys heavily on the stereotypes, and some of the worst ones, of military families, but in this case it doesn't happen behind the closed gates of the base. No these images of what a military spouse is are broadcast to the masses so that people run into someone like me or any of the other military spouses who don't fit that stereotype and they try very hard to push me/them into these stereotypical boxes, so that you don't fit in in the military community or the civilian community at all, unless you compromise who you are and live a lie, or hide as I do behind a pseudonym on a blog. The sheer fact is that you can tell these images have an effect just by scanning the names people blog under: Feminist Military Spouse, Unlikely Wife, Liberal Army Wife, No Model Lady, Indy Army Wife,  and the list goes on from there. Clearly, many military spouses chose pseudonyms that to varying degrees either establish their resonance with the image portrayed of a military spouse, or their dissent from these images. One has to ask, what makes one an Unlikely military spouse, or a Feminist One, or a Liberal one, or a Model one, a Conformist, or an Indy spouse? Maybe the image portrayed in the media, both generated from within the institutional community and generated from without is not who military spouses are.  If this is the case, then one has to ask whether there is inherent value in simply remaining a faceless pseudonym in the blogosphere that can be seen or hidden depending on who happens to be looking for what you are saying.
I understand the worries about operational security, but the truth is that unless one is really foolish no one gives up information they don't intend to. I was interviewed by the local press when I made a go of the military spouse of the year competition last year and I wasn't really even asked about my husband's job. They wanted to know about me as a person. I  think this may be more true than people realize. And I also found the fact that the military wanted to involve themselves in the interview hysterical, for the same reason. I told the Navy, the Press and the security people who did my husband's clearance again this year that I live by one law: My husband's job is my husband's business except in the areas where it directly impacts my life and so I prefer to operate in the dark and lead the life of Smurfette, scientist.
Nevertheless, I think it is imperative that the military and military families step up and deal with these image issues so that Women's Studies scholars don't just publish books calling us Camp Followers, not that there aren't some women who fit the scholarly definition of the term, but we all aren't that; so that the news media doesn't trot us out for public consumption when it wants to do either a feel good partiotism story or an oh, pity the chic story, so that rank isn't perpetuated among spouses in the public realm (and therefore gets perpetuated in the community itself), etc, etc. Rather we need to start owning our diversity, our struggles and our successes and our humanity in much the same way that scientist need to step up to the plate and communicate what we do in a meaningful way to the general public. We can be real people, not cardboard military spouses, in real life and in the public arena without cheapening our sacrifices. I am a huge believer that part of the reason there is the public disconnect between the military and the public is because the military has very defined rules of engagement with the press. They have to stick to the script. We don't.
I think the best example of being a real person in the public spotlight is Michelle Obama. While she's not perfect, she talks about everyday challenges and how to overcome them. She started an organic garden at the White House to educate people about healthy choices. She has her kids make their own beds and she tells us about it. She and I don't always agree, but I always respect the fact that she is honest about who and what she is and that First Lady is just a title, but it doesn't define her. I think military spouses could learn a lot from her example about how to embrace the people who vote on our spouses' ability to have the arms and protection they need in battle, on whether or not we are in a war, on veteran's health care, on military family entitlements, etc. One need only read the article by Ms. Sisk in the Layfette Observer or the comments on any military related post on CNN to realize how desperately we need to start communicating with the public in a way that they can understand and appreciate and if that means we have to entertain them in the process, so be it. The other option is to sit back and let them make decisions that affect us without stepping up and letting our voices be heard or letting a small minority of spouses control the dialogue on the issue. This option will eventually lead to a loss of quality of life for military families.