Why no, I am not grateful!

I am beginning to believe civilians/servicemembers work at being assholes to milspouses.
So far I have been told:

"It's probably a good thing your husband is never around. It helps you focus on working out, instead of sitting on the couch with him watching TV." (when I was explaining that I work out 5x/wk...followed by "You shouldn't swim. It isn't cardio." Note it is listed in the top 5 cardio activities.) I guess it would be pointless to mention I work out for an hour 5x/wk because I am so anxious I would probably collapse under the stress if I didn't distract myself a bit. Plus, I am fat...because I eat too much, because I am stressed all the damn time...
But you're right, I am SOOO LUCKY!

"Your so lucky that your spouse is gone. You can just focus on school." --This is a TOP Idiotic Remark
Right, because I don't ever think about or worry about my spouse. Nor do I arrange my whole life around when he might be available to talk (which often results in be having to work odd hours and never get any damn sleep)...You're right, this is so healthy and wonderful.
Oh and Mr. Masseuse, those knots in my back that you were griping about...those are from worrying about my spouse, my marriage, my education and my family's future, but thanks for being so understanding.

"You should be grateful you and your spouse have spent so much time apart. Lots of couples get sick of each other when they are together." (This was in response to me voicing my concern that we may not be able to make it as a couple if things stay the way they are.)
Anything I say in response to this may be used against me in a court of law.

"If your wife gave up her position and came here, you could spend time with her." (Jefe's boss, in response to our request for leave for my spring break.)
See my response above.

"I totally know how you feel. My bf/spouse/so were separated for X time." --The Classic
Right, that's totally the same. Different coasts, time zones, work schedules, inability to reach your spouse for extended periods...it's totally the same. And even if it were, you've done that for how long? A year? Two? Come back and talk to me when you've been with your SO ~10 yrs and have spent (if you add together any day you may have crossed paths with each other) 1.5ish years together.
Yeah...so enough with the you know EXACTLY how I feel.

And, on a related note: "You're never around any more. Why don't you hang out with us?"
Well, hmmm, how do I answer this?
You see, I am REALLY depressed and I have a CNS reaction to antidepressants, which means there is no relief from my depression.
Realizing I am not graduating in May is just depression times 1000. It means there is ZERO chance of spending time with my spouse in the near future. That would be "fine" if I didn't feel like my marriage has been sliding into the shitter for at least a year now (it's been longer, but denial is a powerful force).
So, I just don't want to hang out...not even to "commiserate" or have a "shoulder to lean on" (*snort/chortle*), because every hour I spend with you is another hour or 12 I have to spend getting my degree instead of being with my spouse. And yes, I do make time for working out and not for you, because if I didn't I'd be locked in an insane asylum now.
So pardon me for "not being any fun". The fun has been sucked right out of me lately. But you're right, this isn't 1about me, it's all about your comfort, your feelings and your denial of my feelings. (Great shoulder BTW).

So civilians (and servicemembers), do me a favor and stop saying idiotic things. Follow your momma's golden rule: "If you don't have anything nice (or at least intelligent) to say, don't say anything at all."

K? Thnx!